Plus sized anxiety.
Basically, Anxiety that you face being “plus sized”.
Now alot of the anxiety is things you would think about if you have social anxiety where you may think you look stupid, or youre not doing it right, or being overly conscious to everybody else.
But i’m going to specifically talk about things plus sized people have to worry about.
Personally I don’t like the phrase “plus sized” as there is no true definition for it but i want to limit the chance of getting caught by the cancel culture so here i am.
In today’s society, plus-sized acceptance is at an all-time high. but it’s not as high as you think.
Nowadays, plus-sized acceptance is aimed at the hourglass body shapes.
Y’know, the ones with big boobs or butt when body shapes like apple shape are ridiculed and made for a joke.
There are actually quite a lot of things plus sized people have to worry about when being plus sized.
I’ll guarantee there are a few that you wouldnt of thought of.
So here we go…
The agonizing anxiety going to see a medical professional when plus size
For an everyday person, going to the GP is an easy(ish) process.
Book the appointment, Go to reception, tell the doc your problem and you are on your way to getting sorted
*thumb up emoji*
Going to the doctors when you’re being plus sized doesn’t work like that.
(Unless you’ve got a really good doctor but that 9 /10 isn’t the case)
No matter what your medical issue is, whether you have a cough, a cold, or a serious medical issue, gp’s will blame the fact you are overweight before looking deeper into the issue.
Now I understand that being overweight can cause health issues, such as heart disease, dental problems, diabetes, and so on. But it isn’t the cause of everything.
(It’s bad that I didn’t need to research that because I’ve been told so many times from the doctors and other medical professionals when that wasn’t even the issue?)
Going to the doctors generally means that you will get some sort of lecture about your weight, even if you are struggling with your mental wellbeing, your weight will still be mentioned.
This has a significant effect on the plus sized community, especially if you are struggling with your mental wellbeing or if you’re having suicidal thoughts.
This is not okay.
I say this because this stops people from going to seek professional help when they need it because of the fear of being judged, which in turn could cause them more harm in the future.
TRIGGER WARNING: This story has talks of Self Harm, Suicide and Overdosing. If you feel triggered from this story please think of your mental health first, even if this means leaving this page. To us your mental health ALWAYS comes first.
In the first lockdown, I was suffering really bad with my mental health.
I was feeling so low that I thought I was on the verge of a relapse.
I felt awful.
I was having really intense thoughts that I just couldn’t deal with.
I called my GP’s as I knew I was already on medication and as a General Practitioner like all doctors, should be trained to deal with what I am going through.
So, I made an appointment through my doctor’s app for an emergency appointment.
When I spoke to the doctor, I was glad that I was speaking to a female doctor as I thought she may have more compassion for what I was going through than a male doctor.
I told her about the thoughts and feelings that I was having and told her that I felt suicidal even though I was on a 7 year streak.
Before I could even fully explain everything, she told me that I needed to relax, to have a sleep, go outside and drink some water and let it pass.
HOW WAS THIS APPROPRIATE ADVISE?
When you are unwell you expect to be treated with the same level of respect you give them.
So when you’re calling about a serious issue and you get fobbed off… BY A PROFESSIONAL.. that’s not right.
Have you had a bad experience with a medical professional? Let me know in the comments.
“Well, the Fashion Industry is obviously safe because everybody plus sized can buy clothes in confidence right? No, Anxiety there?” Well...😕
As said in the beginning, in our society we have more plus-sized acceptance.
But I don’t think there is much plus-sized acceptance of ALL body shapes.
Body shapes that have big boobs and big butts are socially accepted.
But what about body shapes that don’t have those trending features?
Apple body shape, for instance.
Now let me get it straight.
Apple body shapes, just like the rest of them, have a modelling contract with big brand companies.
I do not deny that AT ALL.
But, they are always the ones that are wearing the worst clothing, or their belly is covered up.
You never see a unique apple shape.
Also, you rarely see an apple shape with a bigger belly, like size 24/26.
Not in the UK anyway.
Which, if you are modelling plus sized women, i think this is a more realistic representation of the body shape.
Not everybody has big hips, large boobs, a butt.
The clothing itself for plus sized women are not accustomed to all body shapes.
In the fashion industry clothes are made based on the smaller body sizing and add X amount of inches to a template not accounting for longer bodies or bigger bellies.
This is not an inclusive acceptance, this is objective acceptance and it needs to change.
NOT ALL BODY SHAPES AND SIZES ARE THE SAME; IS WHY ARE CLOTHES MADE THAT WAY?
Another thing with the fashion industry that has a HUGE affect on the publics mental health, especialy if you are plus size, is when they change the measurement for sizes every couple of years, meaning that if you are usually a size 20, you will now be a 22 or 24.
The effect of this is fairly obvious but its gutting.
You believe that youve put on more weight and now you have to diet to continue at your “golden” size.
Y’know the size you think is best.
But in reality no matter what clothing size you are, you probably never put on weight in the first place.
WHY DO THEY DO THIS?
It is horrible!
It has the ability to shatter the self esteem of anybody self concious about their weight. .
“You know what? It doesn't matter what others think, at least you've got your cultural assets behind you? No one ever feels conscious around their family!” Hmm.. 🤔
Being in the Jamaican/West indian culture without the “Normal” features of Big Butt/Big Boobs is something that can damage a plus sized woman’s confidence.
To set the record straight, I am ¾ black and ¼ white, but I identify with my Jamaican / West Indian side more than my White british side.
As a black woman that cannot speak the jamaican tongue, does not have the identifying features of a black woman (tanned skin, large boobs or ass, etc), I don’t even get identified as a black woman – which obviously comes with its own pros and cons.
When I tell people I am black the blank stares are a picture.
So to add being a plus sized woman and being super tall to that I am a walking anomaly.
I know there are so many black women out there that feel the same way.
I’m writing this for you, boo!!
Just because someone is from a certain cultural background doesn’t mean they have to live up to the cultural stereotype.
Being judged that way isn’t okay?
You may be thinking at this point, “erm, you’re kinda straying from the theme here. Do you wanna refocus please?”
I’m speaking about this because when you live outside the cultural stereotype you become the butt of people’s jokes, you could do anything and be ridiculed for it.
Just telling someone you are black, when you’re light skinned is already enough to get you ridiculed for a lifetime.
That is still not okay?
Sometimes just being a cultural outcast can make you feel so lonely and alien.
My Message to those who feel this way
Everything that I have explained isn’t the half of it.
There are so many other things to be mentioned.
But for now, I think this is enough to get the minds thinking.
Please, don’t ever feel as if you are alone.
Know that if you’re reading this, I have been through it too.
You are truely beautiful inside and out, and in no way are you alone.
If you have struggles with these things, then know that in the coming weeks i will be finding ways to help you overcome the barriers put in front of us.
My main key of advice for the moment is to discover and embrace yourself with truth and acceptance.
Understand where you are and where you want to be, and strive to get there.
Instead of hiding away, try everyday to learn about yourself and slowly accept yourself more and more.
When i started on my body confidence journey, i told my self that the harsh criticism that I know others may be thinking or saying about me are invalid.
I try to let them go because I am human, I am no different to them as they are to me.
As long as I spend everyday spreading kindness and making steps to change what I feel self conscious about whether that is my weight or my mindset it is all important.
Believe in yourself and knowledge yourself on your worth.
You are worth everything.